Our Multimedia Guide to NME’s 2009 Sexiest Male Singer List - (Because Our Archives Are Sexy)
Ugh. Voting for anything ‘most sexy’ usually makes me do a 180, probably because keeping a professional facade in this industry is something I really try and maintain. Hence no booze during festivals etc etc and no starf*ckery behavior backstage allowed. However, in flipping through the nominations (go *HERE* to cast your ballot) for the NME Shockwave Awards for ‘Sexiest Male’ this year I realized that splitting open the concert archives might offer some help to decide the verdict. Please note there are no photos relating to the Strokes or Interpol- there are facking enough floating around. Will I vote? Probs not, but knock yourselves out. Ergo I give you the skinniest (mostly) white boys alive - aka some of the top nominees:
WAIT someone made me promise to post these songs to accompany the slideshow. We have NO SHAME anymore obvs.
Haddaway : What Is Love Mp3 (YSI)
Right Said Fred : I’m Too Sexy Mp3 (YSI) ….. OK ON WITH THE SHOW!
At #1 we have Radiohead’s Johnny Greenwood aka the band’s effing backbone. J’adore. PS His hair is full of secrets shhh!
Currently #2 :
Dirty Pretty Things’s Carl Barat smoulders in general. Former bandmate Pete Doherty is on hot on his tail in the ranking…
At #3 is Pete Doherty, aka Dreamboat around these parts. I don’t have any live shots of him, I do however have a photo of a collage found in the garbage waiting to be picked up on St. Marks Place & Ave A. Dreamy! On with the rest of the noms:
Both mop-topped doppelgangers Miles Kane and Alex Turner of the Last Shadow Puppets (and the Rascals + the Arctic Monkeys respectively) made the top 20. Of course. There would have been a kray-kray high pitched statutory riot if not.
The Last Shadow Puppets MEETING PLACE LIVE at Cakeshop NYC - Abbey Braden
It’s time to pretend that I didn’t call ‘Electric Feel’ ‘Electric Eel’ in front of MGMT’s Andrew VanWyngarden this summer backstage at Lolla. Whatever, he was wearing like, mom sunglasses + a chick shirt ergo = incredibly laidback about it all.
The Late of the Pier kiddettes are here and they’re *TINY* (they make MGMT look like pedos) but their sound is HUUUGE:
Late of the Pier Space and the Woods LIVE - Abbey Braden
Jack White is close behind… no new White Stripes album this year, but fresh in readers’ minds = the James Bond song…
PS After the jump see his current hair do and the rest of the noms. Know before you vote!
Oh, Kanye. Kanyekanyekanye. We saw you 3 times this year, one of which had us shivering in the bleachers while the sun began to rise at Bonnaroo. At least you sang the “Good Morning Song” after we had waited for- what was it? OHYEAH 4 HOURS. Because, as is evident in the video for “Stronger” you do know how to put on a show- no lip synching here.
Kanye West LIVE Stronger at the Casio G-Shock Party - Abbey Braden
Alex Kapranos - Franz Ferdinand’s lead singer is a former chef. Errmmm, there are chefs in Scottish Cuisine? Really?
(Just Alex? WTF? As long as we’re on Franz Ferdinand hotness: Hullo Nick McCarthy)
Mark Ronson- formerly Mark from EVR to us- now has schoolgirls around the globe getting their knickers in a twist…
Mark Ronson and Daniel Merriweather Stop Me LIVE at Webster Hall NYC - Abbey Braden
Jared Followill- aka the statutory Kings of Leon brother- is now old enough to vote and drink (but not rent a car) MeYOw!
Damon Albarn- YA THINK? Homeboy could write an opera about a Monkey and I’d watch it. Oh wait, he totally did!
Kele Okereke - Bloc Party
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All of the Wombats made the cut:
The Wombats Lets Dance to Joy Division LIVE NYC - Abbey Braden
Kaiser Chiefs drummer Nick Hodgson: What people should know is Nick is the band’s chief songwriter. The Chief chief…
Ricky Wilson - Kaiser Chiefs: Frontman Ricky made the list of course…
But we say let 2009 be the year of the Nick. He’s ready for his closeup, obvs.
Muse Drummer Dom Howard makes the top 20 as well. He and Nick are the only drummers so far….
You can’t NOT have Patrick Wolf on there because he’s liquid amazing (Watch him growl in the vid) Our name is Tristan!
Patrick Wolf Tristan LIVE at Hiro Ballroom NYC - Abbey Braden
Brits just can’t get enough We Are Scientists, Keith Murphy included. Why is NO ONE talking about his new gray hair? Is the next album really that stressful? Don’t stress! But please do keep kicking off your sets with Phil Collins covers….
James Johnston - Biffy Clyro. People either love this band or they don’t. What do we say? MON THE BIFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!
Biffy Clyro LIVE at Highline Ballroom NYC - Abbey Braden
Thank GOODNESS Dizzee Rascal made the cut, that would have been SO WRONG. His PLUG Award set was all too brief….
Yannis Philippakis, lead singer of Foals, is pretty intense often playing with his back to the audience. Viva Math Rock!!!!
FOALS Electric Bloom LIVE at Union Hall Brooklyn - abbey braden
Both Brandon Flowers and Mark Stoermer of the Killers are on the list. (I know!)
Simon Taylor of Klaxons’ heart belongs to CSS’s Lovefoxx, so those thinking of inquiring should give it a miss:
Oh what the hell it turns out James and Jamie from Klaxons are shortlisted too. YES TONIGHT YOUR NAMES ON THE LIST
Klaxons Golden Skans LIVE at Studio B Brooklyn - Abbey Braden
Yes, Kings of Leon’s lead singer Caleb (older brother to Jared) made the cut too. I tend to leave KOL gigs early because of the squealing fans. I’m not kidding. They pull hair. See you bitches at MSG!
Next on the list, it’s Luke from the Kooks! As much as we poke fun at him, the tunes are standing the test of time :
The Kooks Naive Rooftop Gig NYC - Abbey Braden
Speaking of Muse, people are just not letting go of Matt Bellamy. Nor should they. If by ‘Sexiest Musician Alive’ you mean someone that will put on a life altering perfomance that will change you forever- look no further and pray for absolution.
Look! Gratuitous Johnny Greenwood shot with a theremin! If that doesn’t get your nerd rocks off I don’t know what will. *VOTE*
